I am hitting a NICU-Mom wall. After almost 12-weeks, I'm so tired of this process and she really seems like a baby ready to come home, but no date, yet. Now that she is 4lbs 5oz, I pretty much expect significant weight gains each night. Her caffeine was "DC'd" (taken out of her medication regimen) and her hydro-cortisone is going to be weened to nothing in the next couple days. The only hurdle that she needs to jump before coming home is to eat from a bottle/breast, and she's not doing well, right now.
Eating from a bottle/breast requires her to breathe (which, breathing alone has required support, up until just recently), suck, and swallow in a coordinated fashion so as to not drown in milk. Given her gestational age, it is not surprising that it would take her longer to develop this skill than a Preemie born even just a few days later, gestationally. As a mom of a 3-year-old, I'm familiar with the feeling of being out of control when it comes to certain developments regarding the children, for example: when they are born! But, this whole process has just weighed heavily on me recently, as I am SO ANXIOUS to get her home.
Last week, I came to grips with the fact that I'm not able to work and focus on Stella and Cora, so I'm transitioning out of work, this week. I'm very excited about being able to focus on Cora and I hear how helpful it can be for a consistent care giver to help with her oral feeding training. Even though the doctor told us today that he would expect her to come home in about a month from now, I'm keeping hope alive that she will come home in the next couple weeks... accepting all positive energy to reach this goal!
Here's Cora in her Valentine's onesie that I made at a NICU Family Program. The picture was taken today, just after we watched the CPR and Period of Purple Crying videos (required before discharge) and gave her a bath:
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Eating from a bottle/breast requires her to breathe (which, breathing alone has required support, up until just recently), suck, and swallow in a coordinated fashion so as to not drown in milk. Given her gestational age, it is not surprising that it would take her longer to develop this skill than a Preemie born even just a few days later, gestationally. As a mom of a 3-year-old, I'm familiar with the feeling of being out of control when it comes to certain developments regarding the children, for example: when they are born! But, this whole process has just weighed heavily on me recently, as I am SO ANXIOUS to get her home.
Last week, I came to grips with the fact that I'm not able to work and focus on Stella and Cora, so I'm transitioning out of work, this week. I'm very excited about being able to focus on Cora and I hear how helpful it can be for a consistent care giver to help with her oral feeding training. Even though the doctor told us today that he would expect her to come home in about a month from now, I'm keeping hope alive that she will come home in the next couple weeks... accepting all positive energy to reach this goal!
Here's Cora in her Valentine's onesie that I made at a NICU Family Program. The picture was taken today, just after we watched the CPR and Period of Purple Crying videos (required before discharge) and gave her a bath:
I remember that feeling so well. Walking through the halls, sitting with the monitors, thinking when can we just stop being in the freakin hospital. I also remember dreading to go there, despite how much I loved being with my daughter. I don't know if I've mentioned it to you, but there is a great group on Facebook called Micro Preemie Moms. I've found it so helpful! Along with a group called Exclusively Pumping Breast Milk. Both of these groups have been beneficial to me. Hang in there. The time in the hospital really really really will come to an end-- I promise!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Lisa - I needed to read this. :)
DeleteShe is doing so great! You are nearing the end just hang in there!
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